Poundland Bandit: Issue Number 1

“I queued outside ‘Supreme’ for four days...it ended up being a dry cleaners in Paddington!”

 An unfortunate fan of the New York giant streetwear brand ‘Supreme’ recently caught the bad side of ‘camper culture’ due to a clerical error. Zachary Smith-Dean, 17, made the early trip down from his home town of Portsmouth on Monday morning to assure his place in the busy queue for the brands new merchandise drop on Thursday. I caught up with him to ask exactly what transpired.

 "Well I got into London at around eleven in the morning, I’d never been there before so I didn't know my way around at all. My mum won’t let me have an iPhone because she thinks that I’ll lose or break it so I only had a really crappy Nokia phone that my dad used to use back in like 2003, no internet or anything. 

 Because none of my mates back home are into Supreme and none have ever been to London, I had no idea where the store was, so I found my way over Waterloo bridge and into Covent Garden where I frantically asked anyone I could stop in the street if they knew where Supreme was. Just as I was about to give up, a man dressed in a suit stood outside a pub overheard me. He said ‘Was I looking for Supreme that does fresh clothes’ and I said yes!

 He wrote down the directions on how to get there, I hopped onto the tube and took it to Paddington, when I got out of the station it was pretty easy finding the shop, it was all black with ‘Supreme’ written in big letters on the outside, I’d made it! It was closed with the shutters down which at first I thought was odd but assumed that they were just on lunch, so I set up my camping chair and waited.

 No-one came back that day, or Tuesday, or Wednesday. I thought that they weren't open because they were restocking for the drop, but Thursday came around and they still weren't open! A man passed me walking his dog and asked what I was doing, I told him, he then informed me that it was ‘Supreme Dry Cleaners’ and it had been out of business for years! I was so upset and angry, I called my mum and she found it really funny, safe to say I won't be making a trip back to London any time soon. I guess that's what the man in the suit meant when he said they do ‘fresh clothes."

Written by: Poundland Bandit

Edited by: Pete Flowers